Day 240

So it's been five days since I've written and I swear it felt like everthing I was trying to do was falling apart. It's amazing how much power we give to fear. Well I've missed you all and It’s been way too long since we last spoke. There were a few reasons for my absence. To name a few: my mac is still broken and I hate writing on this mini something, I feel really unmotivated with anything that’s good for me because change freaks me out, and the hurricane. Irene gave me just the excuse I needed to avoid talking about how I was struggling and to stuff my face in the meantime. I hardly exercised last week; I only went to the gym once. I didn’t track one bite and I ate things that I don’t normally eat nor crave like Kit Kat bars. Not to sound like a snob but I don’t even really enjoy American chocolate that much anymore. However, I was reminded that eating junk and not exercising makes me into an angry woman. I don’t like being angry, I like being happy, positive Theresa.

Today was much better. I ate better than yesterday and I busted my tail at body conditioning. I told the instructor that I needed a picture of her. I want to make it into a button or keychain so every time I want to stuff my face, I can remember how hard I worked. She looked at me a little bit like I was crazy so I don't think she's going to give me one and now I feel weird for trying to sneak a pic with my phone. If you have any ideas for something I can physically hold to remind me of the pain of exercise, I am all ears.

So I am committed to action. I am committed to moving forward with my goals, eating healthy, and exercising because it only makes me stronger. When I am not right mind, body, and spirit everything is harder.